Sunday, March 1, 2015

Comic Scripts: West, Part 11

And so the story enters the final showdown. Not a lot else to say at the moment, so I guess I'll just let this post hit the break.

Page Thirteen
Panel 1: The three smith brothers are all in frame, from the torso up. Obie is scowling, Jeb looks puzzled, and Zeb looks pleased.

Obie: Just one.

Jeb: They just gunna hand the money over?

Zeb: Naw... I'd lay odds this fella's got somethin' more amusin' in mind.

Panel 2: Low shot of their feet as they aproach closer to Frank. It's sort of a reference to a movie poster for the film “High Noon.” Look it up. If you still don't know the one I'm talking about, you can ask me.

Frank: Hold up.

Zeb: An' if we ain't in the mood fer digressin', Sheriff?

Panel 3: Close-up on Frank. Sweat is rolling down his brow, and his face is screwed up in concentration.

Frank: Change your mood. I got words to say.

Frank: I been a law-man for twenty years. I ain't gonna claim I've done a perfect job, but I like to think I've done alright by my star, an' by this town.

Panel 4: Similar to panel 2, but in reverse: from near Franks feet, looking at the Smith Brothers.

Frank: An' I've seen your like before. You rule the world, 'cause you make a few folks kowtow to  ya.

Frank: It's all just hollow, though. You all bleed the same as every man. An' I've bled plenty like you in my time.

Panel 5: raised up shot of Frank. He's got a hand positioned right above his gun. He's ready to do this. The Smiths are just standing there, looking almost casual.

Frank: Point is...

Frank: I'm givin' y'all one chance to walk away before I turn things NASTY.

Frank: You gonna take it?

Panel 6: The three of them look at each other, almost bored.

Page Fourteen
Panel 1: All three Smith brothers have their guns out before Frank has even touched his, and all three let out shots that tear right through the Sheriff. They do so almost casually, though Frank has a surprised look on his face even as he spasms with the force of the shots in the chest.

Zeb: Naw.

SFX: B-BANG BANG (Or whatever you come up with for the sound of three guns going off at once.

Panel 2: Silhouette of the scene, as Zeb steps forward, straightening his hat. Frank is already hitting the ground.

Zeb: Whoo.

Zeb: Sure did like his discourse, fer a dead man.

Panel 3: Zeb looks back at his brothers with a grin that is flickering out a little, as a gunshot takes his hat right off his head.

Zeb: Who wants his boo-


Panel 4: Rapid shift as Zeb spins around to face the source of the noise – Chuck is standing up behind a pile of crates, with the shotgun aimed at Zeb. Zeb already has his gun half pointed at Chuck.

Panel 5: Extreme close up on Chuck's face, largely his eyes, to express his anguish over what just happened.

Panel 6: Chuck throws himself back from the barrels as gunshots whizz through the space where he was a second before. One of them, unfortunately, hit him in the shoulder.


Chuck: Uff!


Panel 7: Upward shot as Obie looks up at Wyatt, who isn't even aiming his Gun. Instead, Wyatt is shouting, down into the street, panic in his eyes.

Wyatt: F-FRANK!

Obie: The roof!

Page Fifteen
Panel 1: Wyatt jerks sideways as his takes a bullet in the arm.

Wyatt: FRA-AGH!


Obie: How green ARE these idiots?

Panel 2: Stacy Is looking around a corner at the scene. Zeb and Jeb are running for the alley where Chuck was firing from, and Obie still has his gun pointing up at the rooftop.

Zeb: Don't complain, Obie! If they had a little more sense, things coulda gotten a mite uncomfortable!

Zeb: You take mister marksman up there – Jeb an' me'll get this monkey.

Panel 3: Wyatt dives sideways to avoid Obie's shots, rifle abandoned.



Panel 4: Wyatt hits the rooftop – and goes right through it as the old wood fails to take his weight.


Wyatt: DAGH!

Panel 5: Interior shows the place is abandoned, just some mouldering, ramshackle furniture for Wyatt to land on, and not comfortably. Think, a chair and a dresser. It's only a one story building, so he's probably alive.


Panel 6: Obie stands outside the house, holding the gun almost at a loss for words.

Obie: …

Obie: Idjit.

SFX: bang!

SFX: bang!

Stacy (OP): Hey! HEY!

Panel 7: We see Stacy, leaning around a corner holding Kearn's smoking Derringer, seen back in issue one when he was going through his pack. Only two shot, so as far as Chekov's guns go, it's kinda anticlimactic. The wood frame near her head is splintering as a bullet strikes it. She starts with fear.


Stacy: Dhuh!

Panel 8: Other side of the corner, Stacy slips around it running, fear on her face, as Obie starts running towards her from down the street, reloading as he does. just a note, his gun has a loading door on the side, so he doesn't need to flip out the cylinder to reload, just cram 'em in. This is drawing Obie closer to the jail, not back the way they came.

Stacy(Whispered): oh lord, oh lord, oh lord...

SFX (Distant): BANG BANG

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